I went to my first professional baseball game this week. I’m 49. A few more years and I might have lived my entire life without seeing a single inning. Oh well. It’s not that I’ve been too poor to finance a hot dog ($12), a pretzel ($8), and a soda ($6) at the stadium until… Continue reading Take Me Out of the Ball Game
The neighborhood kids have recently rallied together to teach one of their own how to ride a bike. The instructors, all professional cyclists, range in age from six to ten. The student, a girl, is probably five. It's unclear if she asked for their help. Or even wants to ride the bike. Regardless, they've been… Continue reading Like Riding a Bike
I’m not very good at a lot of things. Normally this isn’t a problem, but back in 2007 I was asked to join a group of friends who were planning to summit Washington State’s Mount Rainier. Most of them, like me, hadn’t ever climbed a big mountain before, let alone a 14,411-foot glaciated stratovolcano that… Continue reading Eating My Way to the Top
My mom called to yell at me on my way to work today. At first I thought she’d found out about that time in college my friends and I got caught sneaking into a penthouse in downtown Vegas, but then realized she was actually yelling because my dad was outside shoveling snow off their driveway… Continue reading Help Wanted
I just spent 30 minutes at the post office. The place was packed, the self-service machine was broken, and there were only three people helping with the lines. But the worst part was how cordial everyone was being to each other. First, an older lady who was literally dragging a laundry basket full of packages… Continue reading Going Not Postal
It’s Saturday morning, 10am. The sun is shining and it’s 70°F outside. Of the million awesome things I could be doing on this beautiful fall day in the Pacific Northwest, I’ve chosen to push a shopping cart around the inside of a grocery store with my wife. Normally, we’d be out riding bikes on some… Continue reading Our Thing
I ran into a tree while mountain biking today. With my face. I don’t remember the specific details that led up to the incident, but I imagine things unfolded like this: First, I was riding along and my face wasn’t hitting any trees, then, quite unexpectedly, it was. Physics and poor judgement are cruel mistresses.… Continue reading Scary Fast
My employer deployed an autonomous robotic mower to the front lawn of my building this week. It’s like a Roomba vacuum cleaner, but with considerably worse collision consequences for sleeping cats. I think it’s awesome, though not just for that reason. If you know me at all, then you know I despise mowing more than… Continue reading The Future of My Dreams
This is a picture of Sentry 2018, or “S18” for short. She’s a spirited young araneus cavaticus that guards my back fence. We just met today. She inherited this position from her mother, S17, who used to welcome me into her home every time I mowed the lawn last summer. Sweet lady. I can sometimes… Continue reading Will Work for Food
My 11-year-old son and I slept in a tent on the snow last night. On purpose. It was all part of the Klondike Derby, an event that was started by the Boy Scouts of America in 1949 because they hated to be warm and dry back then. The picture above shows my son’s troop slogging… Continue reading Decapitation Merit Badge
