I’m balding, separated from my wife, and living in the back bedroom of my parents’ house. Sure, two of those things are only temporary setbacks, but this isn’t how I’d imagined life at 51. Still, I know I’m right where I need to be right now. My dad slipped and broke his hip last week,… Continue reading Slipping
My wife left me. She’s visiting our grandkids and will come back next week, probably, but things are going to be rough around here until then. To survive, the kids and the dog and I created the following 7-day plan: Day 1: Stock up on toilet paper and hand sanitizer.Day 2: Carefully ration out our… Continue reading On Our Own
The flight attendant smiles and waves me forward. “Welcome aboard!” he says. I feel my stomach turn over. The thought of flying doesn’t usually faze me, but after spending the past few days in Disneyland, my body is now systematically programmed to prepare for the impending set of twists, jolts, spins, and drops that generally… Continue reading Buckle Up
One of my coworkers suggested I wear compression socks to a conference on human genomics I went to earlier this month. He said they’d help mitigate the pain of standing at our booth all day which was a lie because they only prevented blood from pooling into my lower legs but did nothing to stop… Continue reading Bad Fit
My 17-year-old daughter is nearly halfway around the world from me right now in Battambang, Cambodia. She’s there for the next couple weeks helping build schools for impoverished nearby villages. She’s also exploring ancient temples, visiting the open markets, and immersing herself in the local culture. To help pass the time while she’s gone, I… Continue reading Justly Concerned
My wife and I just dropped our 17-year-old daughter off at the airport so she can spend the next 2½ weeks volunteering with a humanitarian organization that’s building schools and teaching English in Cambodia. Interesting Fact #1: Cambodia is not a suburb of Seattle. It’s not even in Washington or the Pacific Northwest or the… Continue reading She’s Off for Good
I’ve received multiple “Best Dad Ever!” awards through the years from my children. Sure, most of them were crafted under direct orders from grade school teachers, but the point is I have documented proof that I’m not a terrible father. It’s important you know this before reading any further. My oldest daughter flew home from… Continue reading Awkwardly Silent Night
May 17, 2018 — 10:03 PMI’m in Boston this week for work. Lovely city. My favorite part so far has been losing my credit cards and driver’s license. I’m not worried, though, because I just called TSA and together we came up with a plan to get me through airport security and back home to Seattle tomorrow… Continue reading A TSA Pat-Down and Other Things You Can Experience for Free in Boston
I must have passed a thousand of these little furry things on my bike ride today, most of them somewhere in the midst of crossing multiple lanes of traffic. I’m not sure why. From my perspective, one side of the road looked just as good as the other — a seemingly equal distribution of soil and foliage,… Continue reading Lost En Route Together
I’m rich. Yes, this came as a big surprise to me, too. I always thought I’d notice if anything like this ever happened because I’d start wearing a monocle and would be able to afford luxuries like cufflinks and name-brand cereal. Instead, I read the news in a rejection letter for a government loan that… Continue reading My Best Long-Term Investments
Eating My Way to the Top 