While taking roll on the first day of kindergarten, my teacher asked each of us students, in turn, if we’d prefer to use a name other than the one she’d just read. As expected, most Roberts said they’d like to go by Bob, some Rebeccas opted for either Becca or Becky, and all Richards sensibly… Continue reading Call Me Jerry
I surprised my family with coupons for flu shots last weekend. They were not delighted. I guess I don’t really blame them, especially with all the controversies surrounding vaccinations these days. Are the shots even necessary? Or effective? Or safe? Everything is debatable now, it seems. Back when I was young, things were much simpler:… Continue reading They’ll Thank Me Later
My employer deployed an autonomous robotic mower to the front lawn of my building this week. It’s like a Roomba vacuum cleaner, but with considerably worse collision consequences for sleeping cats. I think it’s awesome, though not just for that reason. If you know me at all, then you know I despise mowing more than… Continue reading The Future of My Dreams
There’s a small scar above my left eye, a keepsake from the time my sister and I tried to dig our way to China. I don’t remember the exact thought process that led to this bold venture, but since I was 5 and she was 13, I’m sure our reasoning was perfectly sound. I’m also… Continue reading Whole
I’m going to have to sell our house and move. Not because the holidays left the carpets permanently covered in Christmas tree sap or because the HOA refuses to abolish it’s ridiculous “No Exotic Pets” rule. That would just be crazy. It’s because our bathroom mirrors are haunted. By demons. I’m not talking about the… Continue reading Don’t Look Back (Please)
