The Cost of Saving

The automatic soap dispenser built into our dishwasher stopped working. Instead of selling our house and moving, I just watched a short how-to video online and fixed it myself. Saved us a ton of money. Was my wife impressed? No, but that’s because she hates having to wash blood out of my clothing. It’s not… Continue reading The Cost of Saving

Swashbuckled

July 10, 2021 My dog would’ve made a terrible pirate. Ivan’s swordsmanship was mediocre, at best, and he certainly couldn’t be trusted to carry around a live parrot. He was notoriously bad, though, at burying treasure. Whenever he’d acquire something particularly valuable, like a marrow bone, he’d rush off to bury it beneath the pear… Continue reading Swashbuckled

Losing Stings

I feel bad for Donald Trump. Hear me out. According to Wikipedia, the poor guy spent his adolescence attending exclusive college prep schools. This means he missed out on the many benefits offered through the public school system, like seventh-grade P.E., which is where most American children are taught to feel bad about themselves. Without… Continue reading Losing Stings

Flash from the Past

My parents are in the process of decluttering their lives and have been busily sifting through the roomfuls of stuff they’ve accumulated through the years. For the past few weeks, then, my dad has been calling and asking about various items before moving them into the appropriate keep/trash/donate piles. Our conversations have typically gone like… Continue reading Flash from the Past

Eating My Way to the Top

I’m not very good at a lot of things. Normally this isn’t a problem, but back in 2007 I was asked to join a group of friends who were planning to summit Washington State’s Mount Rainier. Most of them, like me, hadn’t ever climbed a big mountain before, let alone a 14,411-foot glaciated stratovolcano that… Continue reading Eating My Way to the Top

Navigating by Stars

Work has been hectic lately. I feel like I’ve been on some sort of crazy traffic interchange, caught somewhere between the rush of corporate new hires aggressively merging towards the fast lane and the trickle of timeworn commuters just looking for the nearest exit. It seems we’re all just vying for position on a superhighway… Continue reading Navigating by Stars