July 10, 2021 My dog would’ve made a terrible pirate. Ivan’s swordsmanship was mediocre, at best, and he certainly couldn’t be trusted to carry around a live parrot. He was notoriously bad, though, at burying treasure. Whenever he’d acquire something particularly valuable, like a marrow bone, he’d rush off to bury it beneath the pear… Continue reading Swashbuckled
June 10, 2021 My dog died today. I took him to the vet yesterday for what I thought was an ongoing sensitive-stomach issue, but turned out to be a ruptured mass in his small intestine. The cancer had already spread to his nearby lymph nodes and liver, and he was septic. They gave him 12-hours.… Continue reading Ivan The Terrible
My wife left me. She’s visiting our grandkids and will come back next week, probably, but things are going to be rough around here until then. To survive, the kids and the dog and I created the following 7-day plan: Day 1: Stock up on toilet paper and hand sanitizer.Day 2: Carefully ration out our… Continue reading On Our Own
My dog goes to the door whenever he needs to use the bathroom. Since I don’t want to risk an accident, I always drop whatever I’m doing and let him out as soon as he starts barking. I usually don’t mind, though, because it gives me an excuse to break away from my computer and… Continue reading Who’s a Good Boy?
A stray cat wandered into our backyard yesterday. Our dog, who is always eager to help the less fortunate, made multiple attempts to peacefully redirect it elsewhere. At least that’s how I like to think everything started. Regrettably, by the time I made it outside to see what all the commotion was about, diplomatic negotiations… Continue reading Cat Snacks
My wife jabbed me in ribs this morning at 3am and asked if I was awake. I was. Then she asked if I could hear that sound. I could. It was hard to miss. Our 55lb dog was raucously trudging through our house looking for a suitable place to vomit. Then, he found it. We… Continue reading Wake-Up Call
