Mail 101

My youngest child recently wrote and mailed a letter for the first time. He’s 21. To his credit, he knew he needed to attach a stamp before sending it off. A few years ago, his older sister attempted the same thing but just taped a bunch of quarters onto an envelope.

I know what you’re thinking but let me assure you: Tamie and I are not bad parents.

The two of us spent the better part of a December evening back in 2015 teaching our children, and dog, how mail works. As proof, here is an excerpt from a social media post I sent out afterwards:

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I’d like to apologize in advance to anyone getting a Christmas card from us this year. For last night’s family activity, Tamie orchestrated a card assembly line. It was supposed to work like this: 1) Tamie would sign the cards and hand them off to me. 2) I would stuff them into envelopes and pass them to Dalin and Makenna. 3) They would add return labels and give them to Matison, who would 4) attach address labels and seal them before passing them to Ryker. His job was to 5) slap on the postage stamp. The dog was not assigned a specific task.

We thought things were going pretty well until Matison noticed the return labels were on the wrong corner of approximately half of the envelopes (specifically, Dalin’s half). So, you may need to open it from the bottom when you get it. Also, please don’t be offended if the personalized message isn’t actually for you. We didn’t realize Tamie was customizing them. It’s also possible that your envelope will be completely empty. Or have multiple cards. Finally, if you are allergic to dog hair, you probably shouldn’t even open it. The less you know about that, the better.

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So, there’s that.

It’s not like my kids don’t understand that mail is important. It’s how toilet paper arrives overnight from Amazon, and how they get birthday cash from grandparents. What they may not know, however, is the role it played in their very existence.

When Tamie and I first started dating, we were living in different states and couldn’t afford long‑distance phone bills. So, we wrote. Faithfully. Letters, postcards, and lists. It’s how I learned how much she enjoys sports, and how deeply she despises sour cream. It’s how we shared the details of our lives: the funny and the sad, the fear and the faith, the thrilling and the utterly mundane. It’s how we divulged our secrets, our hopes, and eventually our love.

Two years of stories, sketches, and stamps. And I’ve kept every single one.

My kids believe letters are an antiquated technology. Why pick up a pen and hunt down an envelope when they can text, IM, or Snap?

Because I believe paper carries more than words. And that mail isn’t just about how things arrive. Sometimes, it’s how everything begins.