I went on my last first drive this week. Not to brag, but I think it went pretty well. It’s probably because I’ve been mentally preparing for this milestone since early January, when my youngest child first informed me that I’d be conducting his inaugural driving lesson the moment he turned 14½. According to him,… Continue reading Last First Drive
While taking roll on the first day of kindergarten, my teacher asked each of us students, in turn, if we’d prefer to use a name other than the one she’d just read. As expected, most Roberts said they’d like to go by Bob, some Rebeccas opted for either Becca or Becky, and all Richards sensibly… Continue reading Call Me Jerry
I surprised my family with coupons for flu shots last weekend. They were not delighted. I guess I don’t really blame them, especially with all the controversies surrounding vaccinations these days. Are the shots even necessary? Or effective? Or safe? Everything is debatable now, it seems. Back when I was young, things were much simpler:… Continue reading They’ll Thank Me Later
Do you know what happens when your daughter’s new boyfriend accidentally fills your car’s six-cylinder, fuel-injected gasoline engine with diesel? Because I do. The car continues to run just fine. But only briefly. After a few hundred yards, it will start sputtering. The sputtering then turns to clanking which quickly degenerates to violent shaking. It… Continue reading Last First Date
My youngest son and I tried wake surfing for the first time last week. Despite all the helpful advice I kept shouting at him from the boat like “Try sinking less quickly!” and “You probably need more sunscreen!”, he just couldn’t get up. But the more he failed, the more impressed I became with his… Continue reading Trying, Still
My employer deployed an autonomous robotic mower to the front lawn of my building this week. It’s like a Roomba vacuum cleaner, but with considerably worse collision consequences for sleeping cats. I think it’s awesome, though not just for that reason. If you know me at all, then you know I despise mowing more than… Continue reading The Future of My Dreams
I’m helping to plan a wedding. It’s not for me. I already have a wife. It’s for my son and his fiancé, who is from Boston of all places. I was skeptical about their engagement for a long time because I didn’t believe it was possible to love someone who didn’t fervently hate the Patriots.… Continue reading The Price of Love
My 11-year-old son and I slept in a tent on the snow last night. On purpose. It was all part of the Klondike Derby, an event that was started by the Boy Scouts of America in 1949 because they hated to be warm and dry back then. The picture above shows my son’s troop slogging… Continue reading Decapitation Merit Badge
My oldest daughter turned 18 today. She’ll be graduating high school in June, then leaving for college in August. All this growing-up and moving-away stuff is expected, I guess, but it’s sure happening faster than I’d like. Those who’ve already sent a child off into The Great Big World know I’m muddling my way through… Continue reading Owie
Bad News: There’s smoke coming out from underneath our car.Good News: The car is no longer on fire. If you’ve never been at the epicenter of an explosion before (this was my second time), I assure you it’s nothing like the movies. There’s no accompanying thematic music, for example, or a slow-motion action sequence, or… Continue reading The Exploding Snot
Eating My Way to the Top 