I ordered myself a new electric toothbrush on January 26th. It was supposed to arrive by January 29th but didn’t show up until Feb 5th. This wasn’t that upsetting. In fact, I assumed it’d either be delayed by bad weather or by one of America's new presidential decrees. What truly angered me, though, was knowing… Continue reading Knowing Things Just Makes Me Angry
[I attended the funeral of one of my high school classmates this week. Afterwards, I wrote and shared the following post on my class's FB page. Saving it here for posterity.] David’s service on Wednesday was really nice. It was great seeing so many people honoring his memory and hearing tales about his life since… Continue reading 4Ever a Bobcat
I am not a horse. For most of you, this probably isn’t too surprising. For my 7-year-old sister, however, the news was devastating. In hindsight, my parents should have been more specific as they were rushing out the door towards the hospital back in 1970, because when they promised her they’d bring back something she’d… Continue reading Neigh
Little kids are gross. I know this because my wife and I once had four of them living inside our house AT THE SAME TIME. Stockpiling hand sanitizers helped, of course, but I remember constantly worrying that one of the kids would eventually consume too much toilet paper and die. By “consume” I mean “eat.”… Continue reading Pandemically Challenged
(If you're new here, you may want to start with The Great Decluttering.) In case it isn’t legible, the letter in the photo essentially outlines the consequences of bringing a fake bomb to school in 1986. Before you get all judgy and start pontificating about the imprudence of doing something like this nowadays, let me… Continue reading The Great Decluttering: Part 4
(If you're new here, you may want to start with The Great Decluttering.) I’m not sure if my dog was delighted or horrified when he found out I'd kept this dead frog. On the one hand, he loves exotic foods; on the other hand, he was afraid I’d murdered it myself. I didn’t. My dad… Continue reading The Great Decluttering: Part 3
(If you're new here, you may want to start with The Great Decluttering.) Found my high school letterman jacket and the remnants from my first haircut in 1971. Both still fit. In case I didn't get a chance to tell you personally because I was crying and/or at the office during my birthday party, thank… Continue reading The Great Decluttering: Part 2
The dog and I drove to Southeastern Idaho this summer to help my parents filter through a few odds and ends they’ve collected through the years. By “a few odds and ends” I mean a semitrailer’s worth. I’m not kidding. My dad bought the back half of an 18-wheeler back in early 80s because I… Continue reading The Great Decluttering: Part 1
While taking roll on the first day of kindergarten, my teacher asked each of us students, in turn, if we’d prefer to use a name other than the one she’d just read. As expected, most Roberts said they’d like to go by Bob, some Rebeccas opted for either Becca or Becky, and all Richards sensibly… Continue reading Call Me Jerry
I surprised my family with coupons for flu shots last weekend. They were not delighted. I guess I don’t really blame them, especially with all the controversies surrounding vaccinations these days. Are the shots even necessary? Or effective? Or safe? Everything is debatable now, it seems. Back when I was young, things were much simpler:… Continue reading They’ll Thank Me Later
